Are You Happy?
An Achievable State of Mind
“Happy New Year!” You’ve probably heard and read it countless times by now. But are you? Were you suddenly and miraculously happy when the minute and hour hands aligned at midnight? Have you suddenly changed? Has January 1st somehow revitalized you? How do we balance the happiness we want with the happiness we have? If you answered "no" to at least one of these questions, continue reading.
Happiness is a state of mind—a mindset supported and allowed to flourish through the practices of mindfulness and detachment. When this state of mind is attached solely to the attainment of goals, other people’s behavior, money, etc., we find ourselves in a disillusioned state. We’ve positioned our happiness to be contingent upon the results of something, rather than simply being happy.
When you were a child, you were most likely offered toys or treats to make you happy. When you weren’t allowed these things, or if they were taken away, you became unhappy. At an early age, we are taught to associate our contentment with "having." We grow up needing gifts, certain clothes, gadgets, devices, cars, jobs, social statuses, and relationships to be happy. When gifts are not received, the newest devices are not purchased, a new job is not obtained, or relationships fail, we are unhappy because we’ve made our happiness contingent upon something and/or someone else.
Is it possible to be happy without these things? Can you be happy in debt, jobless, friendless, in old clothes, with an outdated phone? The answer is yes, and it only requires that you acknowledge what is and find an appreciation for it:
I don’t have any friends. My previous friendships were one-sided. I am happy because I am aware and know what boundaries to set with new people I meet.
I am in debt. I am maintaining my essentials and working to improve my situation. I am happy.
I don’t have the newest smartphone. My current phone gets the job done. I am happy.
This type of happiness is founded on peace and cannot be disturbed by having or not having. We understand that life is fluid—there will be ups and downs, changes that we cannot control. However, at the center of it all, even during a storm, we can have peace, knowing that time will continue to shift, and the ups will come again. This practice of awareness, detachment, and peace—happiness—strengthens us and prepares us for the inevitable downs.
Practicing self-awareness takes practice! We have to train ourselves to note what we are feeling and thinking and understand why. Through practices like journaling and meditation, we sharpen our skills and become better able to pick up on disturbances in our state of happiness. Here are a few journal prompts to weave into your happiness check-ins:
How do I feel right now?
Take a few moments to check in with your body, mind, and emotions. Are you at peace, anxious, joyful, frustrated? Be specific.
What triggered this feeling?
Explore what might have led to your current emotional state. Is it an event, a person, or a thought pattern that sparked this reaction?
What would bring me more joy in this moment?
Think about small, simple ways to shift your mood. What is one thing you can do right now to enhance your happiness or peace of mind?
What am I grateful for today?
Gratitude is a powerful tool to shift your perspective. Reflect on things in your life that you feel thankful for.
How do I typically react to stress?
Understanding your default responses to stress can help you reframe your reactions and develop healthier coping strategies.
Mantras to Support Self-Awareness and Happiness:
"I am present, I am aware."
This mantra helps center your mind in the present moment, enhancing mindfulness and emotional awareness.
"I release what no longer serves me."
Use this mantra to let go of negative thoughts or emotions, clearing space for positivity and peace.
"With every breath, I grow in awareness and joy."
This mantra encourages the deep connection between your breath and emotional growth, fostering a greater sense of inner happiness.
Through these practices, we can train our minds and hearts to navigate the ups and downs of life with grace, resilience, and mindfulness.
Our happiness is not controlled by clocks or calendars. We are responsible for all that we perceive and consume and for how we allow those things to either support or disrupt us. May today and every day be filled with the awareness, detachment, and peace—happiness—that you have grown and allowed to flourish within yourself, and may that energy spill into the lives of others.
Ready to Cultivate Lasting Happiness?
Start today by embracing self-awareness and practicing detachment, and watch your happiness flourish from within. If you need guidance or support, I invite you to explore personalized wellness practices to deepen your peace and joy. I’m here to help you create lasting change. Reach out for a consultation, and let’s work together to build the foundation for your happiness.
